We have been communicating from the instant we were born. Why then are courses and seminars on Communicating so popular? Those of us in business are evaluated, at review time, by how effectively we communicate. There is a commonly held opinion that ineffective communication is a major roadblock to business efficiency causing errors that often relate to increased cost and reduced profits.
Your Communicator’s Toolbox holds three main tools. Knowing how to use them is as important to you, as an Administrative Professional, as knowing how to use golf clubs is to a Golf Professional. The better you understand your communicating tools, the more effective you will be.
The Three Tools
Those three tools are: Words, Voice, and Body. Together, they deliver your message. The key point is that you want your three tools to work together to deliver the message you intend to deliver, not a message that is confusing or misunderstood. If your three tools are not working together, your message can’t be received the way you want.
Words
Early man communicated first by using hand gestures and later by painting pictures on rocks and cave walls. When the subject was a horse, they drew an outline of a horse. If the horse had a spot on its shoulder, they painted the spot on the shoulder and everyone knew which horse that was.
When sounds became used as a symbol for a horse, the identity of the horse was unclear. The sounds were symbols that people in the tribe associated with a horse, but without the picture to show which horse, the language had a problem that is still with us today.
A language was born. Different tribes used different sounds to represent a horse or tree or person. The different tribes couldn’t communicate with each other, a problem that exists today around the world.
The lesson here is that words, as we know them, are symbols that represent a thought. It has been said that no word ever has exactly the same meaning twice. That is because the meaning of a word is based on the experience the listener has had with the word. When that experience is called to mind, an emotion is also generated. A word can represent a thought and stimulate a feeling.
When I say the word “fire” to you, your first reaction is impossible to predict. You could have been burned and suffered pain, or you could have been terminated from a job and felt despair and fear, or you could have enjoyed a cozy and romantic evening by a fire and have pleasant feelings.
To be sure your message causes your listener to receive the message you intend, here’s a simple way to help your listener find the meaning you intend and stimulate the emotion you want or at least prevent the emotions you don’t want.
When you paint a picture by numbers, you seldom see the whole picture after painting only the first color. As you add color number 2 and then color number 3, the pictures becomes clearer with each color. That is what you do with words to focus the listener on the meaning you intended for your words. State your thought then, immediately restate the thought using different words. Then do it again using different words again. You may need to restate a sentence, a phrase, or only a word.
Another remedy, if you feel your words might not be understood they way you intend, is to make your statement and immediately expand on part of that statement by using an example or a personal experience reference.
The first step in having your listener receive your message as you intend is to realize that you will probably be misunderstood. It has been said the 75% of all spoken communication is misunderstood. So, don’t just toss out a brief statement and expect it to carry all the meaning and emotion you intend. Take a moment and help your listener receive your message and not generate his or her own message from your words.
Voice
Your voice has three ways of expressing emotion. Your pace, the speed with which you speak and your variations of the speed is a strong tool for delivering emotion – fast for excitement, slow for serious and important. Your pitch, the tone of your voice from low pitch to high can be used as verbal punctuation. Ending a statement with your pitch rising is a signal that you are asking a question. You volume, the loudness of your voice, adds drama and impact. Sometimes low pitch and soft volume can indicate importance, almost like a stage whisper. Put these three together and you have a wide range of combinations to add flavor and impact to your words.
Body
Body Language is a term we have all heard. It simply means that your body posture and how you use your hands can deliver a message that adds to or detracts from your spoken message. Hand gestures should be pantomimes of your words as if playing Charades, and your body position will show your belief in your message. For example, saying, “I’m so excited” while showing a sagging or slouching posture while looking down cancels your words.
If your words, voice, and body are not delivering the same message, your body will be believed first, then your voice, and that doesn’t give your words much of a chance to be understood.
Think a moment before speaking. Think of your message and what you want to send.
Use a combination of voice pace, pitch, and volume to stimulate the drama.
Be sure your posture and hand gestures match your voice and your words.
In short, effective communicating starts with a moment of thought and planning. When you follow these few suggestions, you may be surprised to see your messages being understood better with less time needed for further clarifying.
Your Communicator’s Toolbox holds three main tools. Knowing how to use them is as important to you, as an Administrative Professional, as knowing how to use golf clubs is to a Golf Professional. The better you understand your communicating tools, the more effective you will be.
The Three Tools
Those three tools are: Words, Voice, and Body. Together, they deliver your message. The key point is that you want your three tools to work together to deliver the message you intend to deliver, not a message that is confusing or misunderstood. If your three tools are not working together, your message can’t be received the way you want.
Words
Early man communicated first by using hand gestures and later by painting pictures on rocks and cave walls. When the subject was a horse, they drew an outline of a horse. If the horse had a spot on its shoulder, they painted the spot on the shoulder and everyone knew which horse that was.
When sounds became used as a symbol for a horse, the identity of the horse was unclear. The sounds were symbols that people in the tribe associated with a horse, but without the picture to show which horse, the language had a problem that is still with us today.
A language was born. Different tribes used different sounds to represent a horse or tree or person. The different tribes couldn’t communicate with each other, a problem that exists today around the world.
The lesson here is that words, as we know them, are symbols that represent a thought. It has been said that no word ever has exactly the same meaning twice. That is because the meaning of a word is based on the experience the listener has had with the word. When that experience is called to mind, an emotion is also generated. A word can represent a thought and stimulate a feeling.
When I say the word “fire” to you, your first reaction is impossible to predict. You could have been burned and suffered pain, or you could have been terminated from a job and felt despair and fear, or you could have enjoyed a cozy and romantic evening by a fire and have pleasant feelings.
To be sure your message causes your listener to receive the message you intend, here’s a simple way to help your listener find the meaning you intend and stimulate the emotion you want or at least prevent the emotions you don’t want.
When you paint a picture by numbers, you seldom see the whole picture after painting only the first color. As you add color number 2 and then color number 3, the pictures becomes clearer with each color. That is what you do with words to focus the listener on the meaning you intended for your words. State your thought then, immediately restate the thought using different words. Then do it again using different words again. You may need to restate a sentence, a phrase, or only a word.
Another remedy, if you feel your words might not be understood they way you intend, is to make your statement and immediately expand on part of that statement by using an example or a personal experience reference.
The first step in having your listener receive your message as you intend is to realize that you will probably be misunderstood. It has been said the 75% of all spoken communication is misunderstood. So, don’t just toss out a brief statement and expect it to carry all the meaning and emotion you intend. Take a moment and help your listener receive your message and not generate his or her own message from your words.
Voice
Your voice has three ways of expressing emotion. Your pace, the speed with which you speak and your variations of the speed is a strong tool for delivering emotion – fast for excitement, slow for serious and important. Your pitch, the tone of your voice from low pitch to high can be used as verbal punctuation. Ending a statement with your pitch rising is a signal that you are asking a question. You volume, the loudness of your voice, adds drama and impact. Sometimes low pitch and soft volume can indicate importance, almost like a stage whisper. Put these three together and you have a wide range of combinations to add flavor and impact to your words.
Body
Body Language is a term we have all heard. It simply means that your body posture and how you use your hands can deliver a message that adds to or detracts from your spoken message. Hand gestures should be pantomimes of your words as if playing Charades, and your body position will show your belief in your message. For example, saying, “I’m so excited” while showing a sagging or slouching posture while looking down cancels your words.
If your words, voice, and body are not delivering the same message, your body will be believed first, then your voice, and that doesn’t give your words much of a chance to be understood.
Think a moment before speaking. Think of your message and what you want to send.
Use a combination of voice pace, pitch, and volume to stimulate the drama.
Be sure your posture and hand gestures match your voice and your words.
In short, effective communicating starts with a moment of thought and planning. When you follow these few suggestions, you may be surprised to see your messages being understood better with less time needed for further clarifying.
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